Last Day of Preschool

Today was Caleb's last day of preschool. 

And I cried after I picked him up.

It was around this time last year that we were sending him off to school for the very first time. He was only three years old, we had just had his first IEP, and we were still waiting for his diagnosis. I remember crying my eyes out when we drove home after being told he needed to start school the following Monday. Sobbing. How was I supposed to let go and let someone else care for my son? My son who needed help navigating the confines of everyday life, who couldn't tell me he was sick, couldn't recall the day's events or express why he was upset.

But somehow it worked. It always does. And I'm so thankful to have had the help we needed at this specific time in his development. I truly feel that teachers we had were insurmountable in their expertise, advise, and encouragement. 

And Caleb...Caleb is a rock star. He had good days, rough days and everything in between. He showed us what it meant to truly cherish the small moments as we watched him grow in ways we couldn't have imagined. 

But I'm still nervous. I'm nervous about the future. I'm nervous about his new school, his new goals, his new teacher and aides, his new classmates and potential friends. I'm nervous about finally starting ABA and I'm nervous about his neurologist's appointment next month. And I'm nervous about his HAIRCUT tomorrow! I wonder where he gets his anxiety...? 

But what I can't stay nervous about is where I find my strength...and that my friends is found in the Sovereign Lord. I have my moments of desperation, my moments of tears; but one thing stays constant. And for that I am the most greatful.

*miss you Tj

...song on my heart...

Your Love Never Fails

Nothing can separate

Even if I ran away

Your love never fails

I know I still make mistakes

But You have new mercies for me everyday

Your love never fails

You stay the same through the ages

Your love never changes

There may be pain in the night but joy comes in the morning

And when the oceans rage

I don't have to be afraid

Because I know that You love me

Your love never fails

The wind is strong and the water's deep

But I'm not alone here in these open seas

Cause Your love never fails

The chasm is far too wide

I never thought I'd reach the other side

But Your love never fails

You make all things work together for my good